Atwater Brewery Cherry Stout

Life has thrown me a curve-ball.  My girlfriend's friend went on a diet, so my girlfriend joined in for solidarity, which pretty much means that I have to follow suit.  For the most part, it is not such a bad diet, the food is still good, and I try to take advantage of the chance to be creative with limited ingredients.  Sadly, though,  tacked on to this whole thing is a no-booze clause.  This, of course, is total bullshit.  Why would a sensible adult not imbibe?  Some calories are worth it, in my opinion.  But, all the same, I'm still cutting back on drinking, with exceptions for Thursday drinking with the fellas and my booze blogs.  The upshot of all this boozelessness is that, when I went to pick out a beer today, I was feeling a bit... let's say, thirsty. 

A thirsty man, picking out a beer from an expansive case has a difficult decision to make.  Does one choose something hearty to make up for the absence, maybe a proven style to better the chances of enjoyment, what about that fancy big bottle you've had your eye on?  No, today I picked something small and very questionable, a cherry stout.  What the hell is a cherry stout?  Because if it is exactly what it sounds like, then I'm just going to be cautiously optimistic.  I wonder if I picked a winner.

Atwater Brewery, of Detroit Michigan, produced this "malt beverage with cherry concentrate".  12oz bottle, 6% ABV, dark but a bit thin, fizzy but not foamy.

Detroit has given the world a great many things, the pinnacle of which will always be Robocop, but Atwater Brewery has also been spoken well of.  Now, I like bionic Christ figures as much as the next guy, but I like beer way more than the next guy.  So I tried the cherry stout.  My first impression is that it tastes nothing like cherries or a stout.  That seems like an oversight to me, because if I set out to make a cherry stout, it would really need to taste like a stout with cherry in it.  But what do I know?  I'm just from Texas, where Robocop was filmed.  Suck it, Detroit.

The second glass actually looks more promising.  This pour gave up a solid foamy head that stayed for about half a minute, and the lingering flavors from the first glass have slowly become cherry-chocolate notes. It's subtle carbonation bubbles give off a very yeasty nose, and, even through the allergens there are nice dark malts.  The primary flavor comes from the yeast, followed by the malts, and a whole mess of metallic bubbles.  In fact, if there was a way to make drinking a glass of fuzzy breaded pennies semi-enjoyable, this would be it. There are some cherries that wash past the soft-palate, and the dark chocolaty malts are certainly present.  I guess that is what happens when you add cherry concentrate to a malt beverage.  All the same, "cherry stout"?  Not so much.  A let down.

Detroit, I expected more from you.  You are synonymous with steel and industry, with real American cajones!  This brew is beneath you.  Detroit is better than this.  Sure, you are having some real hard times right now.  Poverty, joblessness, the rancid remains from years of unchecked government corruption.  It must seem so pointless to continue trying, to reach for something better, and to push past the loss of hope.  One of your own, Officer Alex J. Murphy, in spite of impossible odds and facing certain failure still charged ahead and did his best no matter what, even though it cost him is life.  But, like Detroit still might, Officer Murphy rose from the grave stronger, with renewed vigor, and the ability to fuse his lower half with a motorcycle.  I challenge you, Atwater Brewery and Detroiters city-wide, to try again.  Make a cherry stout that doesn't mumble about it's flavors, but instead raises it's voice proudly to the world and says, "I am Detroit!  This is a stout beer and it tastes like it has some cherries in it!"  Please call me when you do.  Until then, this one isn't all that great.